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Canton dad
will never forget love and support
By Jay Turner
Citizen Staff
For as long
as he can remember, Jonathan Forman has been the independent,
go-getter type. A single father of two who recently moved to
Canton, Forman even handled his own custody proceedings in court
after learning that his attorney had passed away.
“I think
they call it pro se,” said the 40-year-old Randolph
native. “It didn’t turn out to be all that hard.”
 Although it
took some time to settle in and adjust to a new situation,
Forman made sure that everything - school, activities, doctors,
dentists - was in order for his two girls: Aimee, who is now 11,
and Sabrina, now 7.
And while
life was admittedly far from perfect, Forman, it appeared, was
managing just fine on his own.
“We were
just trying to keep our lives as simple as possible, all things
considered, of course,” he said.
But
inevitably, as Forman put it, “complexity still [found] its way
in,” and it came in the form of an unexpected and very
frightening diagnosis.
“It was a
bit of a shock at first,” said Forman about learning in April
that he had cancer. He and the doctors had initially thought it
was just pneumonia, but further testing revealed a 9-centimeter
tumor in his chest wall, known as Ewing’s sarcoma. Even worse,
Forman said the cancer had already started to metastasize, as
doctors found nodules in his lungs.
After the
shock wore off, however, Forman left self-pity behind and went
into immediate attack mode.
“Once I was
diagnosed, I said, ‘Let’s get started right away,’” Forman said,
noting that within a week he was at Mass General Hospital with
an entire team of doctors, and by the next day he was starting
chemotherapy.
He was
determined to be strong and battle his sickness; but he also
came to realize he would need a lot of support, which came as
soon as people heard the news.
Forman had
lost his mother from cancer in 1981 and was not very close to
his father, but the family he did have nearby, including his
aunt Sandy Goldstein, older brother Barry and older sister
Julie, “mobilized” immediately.
Sandy, in
particular, Forman said, has been “wonderful,” taking the kids
while he has treatment and driving them to school and
activities.
“She just
stepped right up,” he said. “She’s still coming and taking the
kids four, five, six days at a time.”
Soon enough,
staff and parents at the Hansen elementary school, where the
girls attended last year, got involved.
Aimee’s
fifth-grade teacher, Lori Mooney, and school counselor Leann
Kaplan brought the family’s needs to the attention of the school
CAPT and other parents, and they responded by giving the family
a manila envelope “stuffed full” of various gift cards. They
also pitched in to send both girls to one week of summer camp at
Pequitside and four weeks at the Ponkapoag Outdoor Center.
“As for the
school’s involvement and Lori Mooney in particular, they have
not only helped with our situation, they’ve really done a huge
job in helping my daughters cope,” Forman said, “and the summer
camp is also helping to divert them from worrying about what is
happening to me.”
Forman
called the summer camp opportunity for his girls “priceless”
because it enables him to get treatment or to go to work when he
is feeling well enough. “And all of this [support] has happened
virtually anonymously,” he added.
Forman, who
works in the IT division for BJ’s Wholesale Club, received a
similar outpouring of support from his coworkers as 30 of them
chose to shave their heads in a show of solidarity. A female
coworker even shaved her head completely and two others cut
their hair down to one inch.
“My first
day back to work, it was unbelievable to walk into that building
and see just a multitude of shaved heads,” said Forman, fighting
back tears.
He said he
has also received financial support, prepared meals, groceries
from BJ’s, flowers, and “cards and cards and cards.” And people
are now beginning to ask what his daughters’ clothes sizes are
in order to help out with back to school shopping.
***
For a guy
who is used to doing so much himself, having cancer and having
to rely so much on others has been difficult at times for
Forman.
“It’s been a
life lesson to me on how to accept help,” he said. “And I’ve
learned a lot about people in this process.”
In agreeing
to share his story with the Citizen, Forman said he was
hoping to let people know how grateful he was for their help,
and also “how capable people are of doing good.”
“I think,
deep-down, probably all of this happened to teach me something,”
he said.
And while he
still has a number of treatments left to undergo and is not
cancer-free just yet, Forman wanted to make it clear that his
story is far from over. He still wants to fulfill his dream of
starting his own business, and of course, wants to continue to
be there for his daughters and watch them grow.
But even
when that day comes that the cancer is gone and life begins to
get simple again, Forman said he will never forget the love and
support of his family, friends and community.
“As it goes
forward, I will remember all of this,” Forman said.
July 31, 2008
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